love hard.

im in love again.

a marvelous feeling i must say that im not even sure if im fully capable of handling, but at the very least, i am fully capable of mishandling. but its a learning process i suppose. to learn to fully open yourself and commit your heart to someone who has every ability to do one of two things: make it last forever...or not.

so i guess it scares me sometimes to see myself this way. so vulnerable and afraid, yet so willing to compromise my sanity for this new thing called love, which aint so new to me even tho is sometimes seems to be. im rambling. and thats ok. all these feelings that some view as negative have somehow found their way into a positive space in my life. i love how she makes me weak. unable to speak or fight the tears when she tells me im the first thing on her mind every morning. she makes me fragile. cause its easy for me to crumble into her arms after a long day because i know she will be there.

caring. understanding. willing to take on any battle in my life as her own. bonnie and bonnie i'd say.

others can only wish to be so lucky

but sadly, a part of me really does wish that this love was a dream. so id never have to wake up from it and so if it ever ended, it wouldnt hurt as much, because in fact, it was never real. oh but its is real. sometimes too real to the point where i cant even fathom the thought of a life without her by my side. its odd how life presents itself and how love shows its face in your reflection when you arent even looking.